Why I am Nothing But Me

STOP!

EVERYBODY JUST STOP!

I AM NOT A PUZZLE PIECE.

STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME FIT!

I AM ME! ONLY ME!

This is it! I'm fed up! Every single problem I have somehow relates back to the fact that I'm constantly being told which way I'm supposed to act because of some strange element of my personality. My whole being is supposedly dictated by a few scribbled in answers on a standardized test taken when I was in the second grade.

I'm an introvert or an extrovert.

I'm smart or stupid.

I'm ugly or beautiful.

NO I'M NOT!

I'M NONE OF THESE THINGS.

Do you want to know what I am according to the world?

I'm smart because I took an IQ test and got a score of 133 but I'm not really all that smart when it comes to math or science because I'm a girl and girls aren't allowed to be smart at the "real" subjects. And I also can't do well in science because let's not forget I'm a Catholic and Catholics don't mix well with science.

I'm either an INFP or ENFP depending on which of the Meyers-Briggs personality tests I take, which means I can only be some flighty, hot-headed, dreamer who is unable to thing logically or take criticism.

I'm atrocious at any sort of sports because I don't run well at all and I have very poor vision and even worse hand-eye coordination than my vision.

I'm fat and ugly because I weigh more than what is considered desirable by the media and have no worth or substance because of it.

I hate other women and gay people because I'm pro-life and pro-marriage.

I'm stupid because I'm blonde.

I'm a Nazi because I'm of German heritage.

I'm a horrible artist because I can't draw realistically from memory.

I can't write well.

I'm nosy.

I'm boring.

I'm loud.

I'm nobody.

This really sucks! It's not true! No one ever took into account that simple things in English or Latin would make less sense to me than some difficult geometry or algebra concept or that I'd sometimes have trouble with entire courses and be proud of getting a C on a test in that class! It was never considered that I'm able to run a lab like nobody's business or hold an intelligent, serious, level-headed discussion. And certainly no one saw what a killer job I do at floor hockey and volley ball.

I'm beautiful even if I could stand to lose a few pounds.

I love everyone.

I'm really freaking smart.

I can just cook better and intimidate people with more effect than a non-German.

I do killer abstract work and really well realistically with a reference.

I'm LEARNING how to write better. (And my poems are already pretty freaking great).

I stick my nose in because I care about and want to help people.

I'm fabulously interesting.

I can be louder but I sit there and think more than you'll ever know.

I am somebody because I am a princess and I am a princess because my Father is the King of Kings.

Do you SEE? Do you see the LIES they tell us? Because of what other people spouted off based on opinions formed off of face value I was screwed up inside for years. People tested me and determined I could only do certain things based on those results. For a long time I believed them because, aside from a few people, it was all I heard.

I thought it was just me for awhile. I thought the world was everyone else's oyster. But you know what? It isn't! We tell little kids that they can be anything they want to be and then we give them some number two pencils and scan-tron sheets and tell them that the bubbles they fill in determine the rest of their lives.

And we wonder why kids are so screwed up.

So here's my challenge! Learn something new! Paint a picture! Go on a walk! Invent the cure for cancer! Do what you've always wanted to but never dreamed you ever could, so long as you throw away the labels that have kept you confined to your own little world for so long. I know it seems daunting, and yes, you may feel like a less-enthusiastic Hercules in "Go the Distance" for some time, but you'll be fine. Because what you are really meant to do in this world has already been thought of by a Planner far greater than you will ever be.

Trust in Him, shed those oppressive labels, and regain some of your hope for humanity.

In the end, you'll be happier than you've ever been.

Ciao lovelies,

-Captain Pick